Oh that devil inside. Do you make yourself known? When the switch flips south and light exits the room you attack my thoughts without mercy. Your resolve and will is ideal. You drive your intentions deep into my soul. And there I am, the monster inside playing around inside of me like a wrecking ball. You exist in all of my doubt about life and tear me apart the more I try and run from you.
But I will fight no longer, only to warmly embrace your presence. Does this bemuse you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so powerful and so tight due to my disability to see that it was the battle that created your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more that I moved. But like I announced before, I embrace the darkness now.
Things have changed. I'll see now that darkness can deliver light. There isn't any fear in this heart anymore in regards to you showing up. Why? Because... you are here...right here deep inside of me. Not walled out from me any longer. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Actually present.
I really am truly mindful of what you now are and who you turned me into. I'm not attempting to fool anyone any more by showing them a grin on my face. No, I should just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all those times you cut me down. Now, let's go for a walk and work this thing out. I want to hear what you would like to say about all of the years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you proud of your accomplishments? Maybe... I will be able to even clap to your success?
But we are moving on and this is the beginning of a long relationship. It's going to be difficult, but I'm going to start talking with you for the first time. But now, my decisions are based on light. It is time to begin to live my life and make the best choices I possibly can. But I know I must check in with you...oh harsh devil within. You can show me an untraveled path that absolutely is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I have always been scared to go. But to ignore you further would be out of idiocy. Shame. Fear.
So let's go for a walk. I would like to hear what you have got to say.
But I will fight no longer, only to warmly embrace your presence. Does this bemuse you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so powerful and so tight due to my disability to see that it was the battle that created your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more that I moved. But like I announced before, I embrace the darkness now.
Things have changed. I'll see now that darkness can deliver light. There isn't any fear in this heart anymore in regards to you showing up. Why? Because... you are here...right here deep inside of me. Not walled out from me any longer. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Actually present.
I really am truly mindful of what you now are and who you turned me into. I'm not attempting to fool anyone any more by showing them a grin on my face. No, I should just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all those times you cut me down. Now, let's go for a walk and work this thing out. I want to hear what you would like to say about all of the years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you proud of your accomplishments? Maybe... I will be able to even clap to your success?
But we are moving on and this is the beginning of a long relationship. It's going to be difficult, but I'm going to start talking with you for the first time. But now, my decisions are based on light. It is time to begin to live my life and make the best choices I possibly can. But I know I must check in with you...oh harsh devil within. You can show me an untraveled path that absolutely is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I have always been scared to go. But to ignore you further would be out of idiocy. Shame. Fear.
So let's go for a walk. I would like to hear what you have got to say.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement a website dedicated to spreading encouraging words to everyone who visits and giving them a reason to continue chasing after their dreams. If you are stuck in a rough place, perhaps dealing with that devil within right now, please read these quotes about depression. They will help. A lot.
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